Spoken by the Supreme Master Ching Hai
at a Seven-day Retreat in Hsihu, Miaoli, Formosa
May 5-12, 1991 (Originally in Chinese) Videotape No.165
When I talk to you about marriage and love, please do not think that I am going beyond my responsibility. No! I do it because you cannot go into Samadhi in your meditation if you do not have a happy marriage or good relations with your spouse. You feel inner anguish and emotional turmoil. Your mind is filled with all those things. You cannot even recite the Holy Names, not to mention entering Samadhi! At that time your partner is more important than the Master. But I do not blame you because such things are unavoidable. At that moment, you do not even want to go into Nirvana. Even if you do, you cannot because you are unhappy. I have gone through all this before, so I can be your teacher now. Such situations are difficult to avoid and control.
Of course, when we progress spiritually, we know how to deal with our loving marital relationships. However, there are some fellow practitioners who feel emotionally depressed and miserable inside. Therefore, I have to talk to you about worldly affairs because they are related to spiritual practice. When you are happy, you are in Nirvana. No matter who comes to you, you feel happy, and you can love anyone or forgive anyone or give anything to anyone. But when you are not happy, you don't want to do anything or take any responsibility. You can't, even if you want to, because you don't have the inspiration to do so. At that time, you are tired of everything and want to forget the whole world. That's why there is a saying that goes, "The Dharma exists in worldly affairs." Am I right? (Audience: Yes.) That's it. You have all experienced it.
Therefore, I often say that if you want to proceed smoothly along the spiritual path, you have to protect your emotions and your marriage. Those of you who are still single should protect your relationships with your loved ones as well, if you truly love each other. It will be too late if you try to make amends once you break up. Beautiful times do not last forever. You don't always meet someone you really love and want to share your life with. So take care once you find him or her.
Don't think that it is a trivial or worldly affair. No! No! People often feel lonely without a companion. Some can bear it, but most can't. So take care to protect it if you still need it.
Even small pearls are protected and cherished as treasures, let alone love! It could be very helpful to you. Though you should not be attached to it, you cannot ignore it, either. A car may not be a person like you are, or a part of you, but you still need it to come to Hsihu. It would be too inconvenient and time-consuming to come on foot. You can't say, "I come to Hsihu to practice spiritually and get enlightenment. Why do I need a car? It is only a physical vehicle. Just abandon it by the roadside!" You can't do that. It takes you much less time and brings you to me more quickly. You can save much time for meditation. Of course, you can come on foot, but it would take you several months, and I would have probably left by the time you arrived.